RE-POST: The Dancers' Plague

..It's not the same as it used to be. Individuals who started to take up this art in the mid to late nineties can vouch for this. It was all about the things we did together outside of rehearsals that mattered most. We didnt care about staying past midnight because it was worth it. We didnt care what we wore as long as we all represented the same effort. Music selection was a mere representation of the mood we would all be in and competitions were just an excuse for all of us to perform.

Today, dancing has taken a dramatic turn. All of a sudden, the love of dance slowly began to diminish and the driving force to perform revolved solely around being the best and most original. And within a blink of an eye, competitions served only that purpose...to WIN. The dance scene rapidly morphed into a cult-like phenomena similar to that of adolescent southern beauty pageants. Dancers have become like hungry mothers with their teams. Wear the perfect outfit...apply the right make- up...carry yourself on stage with pride and confidence...smile...wow the crowd...be better than the other contestants....sound familiar? Don’t get me wrong, to certain degrees competition is good. It's what motivates many of us to do better. It is a natural human condition that we utilize for self improvement. It is when we make competition the burning core to which our world of dance revolves around that it creates a shady and shallow surface.

Loyalties have been betrayed; friendships lost; identities tangled.This has become an all too familiar fate for the new generation breed of dancers. They have no idea what it means to devote themselves to the cause. They claim to love the art, but what they mean to say is that they love how the art makes them look. But the moment something better breaks its way through, they're out the door. If we were to give up on everything we were doing each time something better came along the way, we would never get ANYTHING done. That is the story of life. There is nothing wrong with moving onto newer things. Challenges should always be embraced no matter what. But there is no use in trying to reach for the stars if you're not willing to climb the mountains that bring you closer to it. And then when you've reached that top and you're sitting there bleeding and bruised, that is when you've EARNED the right to pursue a bigger mountain. Dancers today think they can just tie on their new dunks and hop their way up into the stars not knowing what it actually takes to really become one. And it's sad.
But not all dancers are at fault for this. This new breed came into the dance scene when the artform was in full throttle. So for some of them, this is all they know. It's like a rich child growing up sheltered, naïve and ignorant to the welfare of society. Is it really their fault for only knowing the glamour of life? I presume it isn't. But if they don’t educate themselves on what it means to work and earn that lifestyle then they will never be able to fully reap the fulfillment of who they are, what they do, and most importantly: what they HAVE.

Who would have ever thought that we would invest so much of our time and energy into something that doesn't pay our bills or rent?? I know why...because we LOVE it. Dance is our escape from the bitter realities of the world. It is our refuge from the personal tyranny that haunts us from the inside. We learn a lot about ourselves in this process and we become humanly stronger because of it. It is a God-given talent we were blessed with and subconsciously we apply it metaphorically throughout life.

So ask yourself this...why do you dance? Why do you do it? Why???

It's Complicated

I’ve realized that life is indeed full of contradictions. Sometimes it’s crazy to be sane, you need to fall to fly, people suffer because you care.

You have to unlearn to know the lesson, you have to give up because you are strong, you have to be wrong to make things right.

Nonetheless, life’s complexities are also life’s source of beauty. We should cry to laugh again, fall apart to be whole again, & get hurt to love again.

-boatmate

======================================================

[[[ Why can't we just go back to the good 'ol days when life ain't that complicated…when our happiness lies on a yummy pasalubong or a day-out in the park or a you've-been-such-a-good-girl-you-deserve-an-all-u-can-eat-Jollibee-treat! ]]]

Chronicles of a Breakup

On love...found and lost... letting go... moving on... living life... starting over... and falling in love all over again.

The world is a great place. And being in love is one of the greatest feelings - tingles and everything. Conversely, having your heart broken sucks - big time! Two extreme emotions in the spectrum of love. Wouldn’t it have been much simpler if you had just stayed IN-love for the rest of your life? But that's not how the game of love is played. You'll never know that it's over until it's over. Sad thing is, whatever you do, you'll always be powerless against the twisted hands of fate. You'll just have to accept the bitter truth, swallow your pride and try your best not to be consumed by remorse and self-doubt.

Breakups are always hard - even the most amicable and mutual of separations - to both the dumper and the dumpee. And relationships that lasted for years are the hardest to come out of. The dumper is often plagued by feelings of guilt over breaking somebody's heart. Somebody whom the dumper deeply and genuinely(?) cared about. Countless days, nights, weeks or even months of thoughtful contemplation precedes THE "deed". The cons of staying in the relationship obviously outweighed the pros; hence, the unbelievably heart-wrenching but viciously honest final act of love is tendered. It is done. Au contraire for the dumpee, this is just the beginning. It’s like a rug has been pulled out from under you and your world has been turned upside-down. A swarm of overwhelming emotions torments you all at the same time – pain, fear, doubt, confusion, sadness, betrayal, etc. There are so many questions you want answered but you fear hearing them resolved with brutal honesty lest you get hurt even more. You feel sick… forlorn… dejected… abandoned… betrayed… empty… and miserably lost. But no matter what you do, the memory of love lost torments your every waking hour; then sleepless nights follow. You lose your appetite and your weight drops, your work suffers and even your other relationships take the back seat. You can’t seem to get a grip on things. You can’t take the first step because you don’t know how to. You blame the other woman…you blame your ex…you blame yourself. Sounds familiar? Well, this is the story of us all… of love and loss.

Oftentimes, we dwell in the past...endlessly torturing ourselves with thoughts of "I'm the one for him, he just can't see it now...but he will, eventually" or "Will I ever find another great love? Did I just lose my chance?" or "He'll come to his senses and when he does, I'll be right here waiting". Newsflash: Both of you may have been the greatest persons on earth, shared great chemistry, loved each other deeply; but now, you’re just not right for each other anymore. Because no matter how hard you try to cram your toes inside, if the shoe no longer fits – albeit it’s your favorite pair - it’s time to lay it aside and look for new ones. Thus, commencing your seemingly endless quest for that elusive perfect shoe.*** Truth of the matter is that: it’s called a breakup because it’s broken. Deny it all you want, but deep down inside, you know this to be true on some level. Feelings fade, people change and there’s nothing you can do about it – it’s a fact of life…offering no reason to numb the pain… this just is… the harsh but liberating truth. First step is acceptance. The best worst news is, you get to start over. You have full reign of your life. Enjoy this time while you can. Do all the things you have been thinking and planning to do but had no time – see the world, splurge, pamper yourself, catch up on your reading, reconnect with old friends. Because you’ll never know when love will come knocking on your door once again and the next relationship you’ll get into can be the one that lasts forever. However unthinkable these ”things” are, they do happen for a reason. It may be unfathomable to us now but all shall be revealed in time. Don’t go looking for answers that you know you’re not ready to be uncovered. Be patient… be still... better things will come. A perfect plan has already been laid out for you and all you have to do now... is wait. Don’t ruin your chance of finding your happy-ever-after by sticking it out with a relationship that you know has already been broken long before you even realize that it was.

Someday…somehow… things will fall in their rightful places. What’s meant to be, will ALWAYS find a way. But if it isn’t, live and let live… Be grateful for the fact that even once in your life, you have loved and have been genuinely loved in return. No regrets. No misgivings.

Let go... move on... live life... start anew... find love… and fall all over again.

And with William Ernest Henley, I’ll take my leave:

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of Circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of Chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Good night.

*****

Soon to come...
My Breakup Diary
The Quest for the Perfect Shoe*** (to be co-authored w/ Ate Berns)

******

Quotable Quotes

© "I dream of you when I'm asleep, you even appear when I'm awake...daydreaming. There is no escaping you. I just wish it was true."

© "All that I am...all that I see...all that I dream and do are brighter, more beautiful and meaningful, because of my feelings for you."

© "I can't escape the thought of you. Even in my dreams you are there. It's not fair how you're gone, and how you're moving on so fast, while I am still living in the past."

© "You can’t make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved, the rest is up to the person to realize your worth."

© "Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end."

© "What's meant to be will always find a way."

© "A gift may not be able to represent how deep a person is in love with you, but one thing is certain, a person who never gives will never be able to take."

© "You'll be surprised to know how far you can go from the point where you thought it was the end."

© "I would rather have three minutes of wonderful, than a lifetime of nothing special."

© "Never rush into falling in love, because love never runs out; let love be the one to knock at your door. Besides, true love is worth waiting for."

My Love Story: LOVE CONQUERS ALL

Chie, Love Conquers All is your primary love story!

At its core, the Love Conquers All story is very romantic, triumphant, and full of courage to face yourself with honesty. The catalyst for change in your love story is usually a pivotal event, circumstance, or reevaluation of yourself.

Where should you look for these pivotal moments? Challenges may come from family and society — even yourself. Do loved ones disapprove of your partner, raise concerns you hadn't previously cared that much about? Turning points may also stem from previous obligations at work, or in promises you've made to others. Do you reschedule or delay plans with your partner because you feel the need to honor responsibilities at the office? Do you prioritize taking care of a friend in need over the needs of your mate?

These themes are echoed throughout history and recorded in diaries, novels, television and films. In Jane Austin's novel "Emma" for example, the protagonist put everybody else's romantic needs before her own. Had she not stopped to question herself, she would have missed a chance for love altogether. Was she just looking after her friends? Or was she guarding herself from the potential hurt of a relationship or unrequited love?

Ambition to be loyal to loved ones, move ahead at work, improve your home, see the world — these are all good things. But sometimes, they take precedence over your love life — whether you are conscious of it or not. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but think about it. Are you ever afraid of being held back from your goals? Or that a relationship might make attaining those goals a slower process, or change them completely?

Remember Nicolas Cage in the film "Family Man"? Through a strange twist of fate, he's given the opportunity to see life as it might have been had he gotten married instead of pursued successes at work. Though fantastical and magical, he experiences a jarring event, and through it, realizes he has different priorities. He would give up his important job and expensive belongings to be with the one woman he realizes he truly loves. And he realizes that his initial choice to pursue his career instead of pursue his relationship was driven not by his hopes for success, but his fear of taking on the seriousness of his relationship. With this insight, he has the courage to face himself, not preexisting hopes and goals.

Even if fate doesn't throw obstacles in your way, it's possible that you do. Do you shy away from romantic commitments? Do you make excuses for not dating? Do you wish your relationships never progressed passed the lovey-dovey stage? Are the people you date "all wrong" for you? There's a reason you're holding back from pursuing a good thing. You may put excuses between you and another person, or you may intentionally pick the wrong person to give you an out, an alternative to getting serious. The real courage in your love story comes from taking a good look at yourself, and questioning your motivations.

Once you recognize this as your story, you will indeed have the courage and the insight to question yourself and make a commitment, or break with someone before external events force you to. In this manner, Courage is one of the most noble and truthful love stories out there.

In "Notting Hill," Julia Roberts plays a movie star whose career (not to mention awful boyfriend) get in the way of a fledgling romance with a London bookseller (Hugh Grant). In "Autumn in New York," a cheating playboy played by Richard Gere finds himself in love with a dying 22-year-old. Will he mend his ways before it's too late? The love story that drives these plots is the same that drives your fantasies and relationships, which is why these stories can be so powerful. Of course, in the movies it's always clear just whom the lead person should hook up with. In real life, it's quite a bit harder. Love Conquers All, and now you're equipped to find it.

All Hail the Hopeless...Ooops!...Idealistic Romantics!!!

Chie, when you're head over heels, you are an Idealistic Romantic!

The rituals of romance are important to you. And for that reason, if the object of your affections doesn't appreciate the value of things like red roses and candlelight dinners, they might not hold your interest for very long. However, you're not just looking for a thoughtful date who appreciates romantic gestures. You seek a deeper emotional bond.Once you find that special love, you'll probably be the first to declare that you're head-over-heels rather than hold back you're emotions. After all, what good is being in love if you can't share it?

Love does change you. Whether it simply enhances who you already are, or makes you a completely different person, finding someone whose love personality compliments your own makes for the longest, happiest relationships.

****
How so very true. *sigh*

I see Green!

When the results did not yield purple-lilac-violet-periwinkle or lavender, I was a wee-bit disappointed. Oh alright, not just a tad...a bit...a pinch but totally downtrodden (pardon the melodrama). The thing that got to me really was that it wasn't even blue or red or even pink...it was GREEN! Of all the colors, my one true color was green! There has to be some mistake, so I re-took the test (just to somehow appease my bludgeoning mind) without even a glimpse on the explanation below it. With some minor alterations on my previous answers – those which I had second thoughts on my first try – I clicked on the submit button with eager anticipation. But much to my dismay, there it was again…that undesirable word in bold, impudent, tauntingly lettered G-R-E-E-N! My thoughts were dispersed in sporadic details…

Me…green…envy…jealousy…suspicion…distrust…moolah…

As I conceded, I read on… shedding light to my convoluted mind… banishing all malevolent associations…then, slowly turning my frown upside down with the unraveling of the mystery behind the formerly undesirable color that was…GREEN!



Chie, your true color is Green!
You're green, the color of growth and vigor. Good-hearted and giving, you have a knack for finding and bringing out the best in people. Green is the most down-to-earth color in the spectrum — reliable and trustworthy. People know they can count on you to be around in times of need, since your concern for people is genuine and sincere. You take pride in being a good friend. For you, success is measured in terms of personal achievement and growth, not by status or position. Rare as emeralds, greens are wonderful, natural people. It truly is your color!

What's Your True Color?
Brought to you by Tickle

The Goddess in Me

SIREN?!?!?! Couldn't believe it either. I actually re-took this test desparately wanting to unravel a different goddess that resides in deep slumber within my beautiful self. But, heaven forbid, the enchanting voice of this mesmerizing creature is definitely lost in me... but if siren = fashion goddess...so be it. No contest in that.


Chie, you're Siren!
Like the beautiful sea mermaids who've swum before you, Siren, you certainly have a way of drawing people in. Whether wooing a crush with your alluring voice or impressing someone with your unique take on the world, you're sure to captivate more than your share of audiences.It must be the balance between your glittering personality and your individual style that keeps friends and family enamored by your presence. From being able to predict next season's "it" color to pairing leopard print with plaid before it hits the pages of Vogue, people see you as a fashion goddess. You may not want to admit it, but you're part trendsetter and people look to you for direction. Of course, you know there's more to life than shopping for the latest adorable accessory. You pursue success in all aspects of life — from offering creative insights at work to running marathons. You have big dreams, Siren, and by keeping them in sharp focus, you're sure to come out a winner.

What's Your Goddess Identity?
Brought to you by Tickle

We all know our IQ's and EQ's but I didn't have an inkling that there exists such a thing called "Relationship IQ"... Anyways, just went along with this one. Don't even know what my score means!Reliability...nada. Accuracy...zilch. Fun and enjoyment... will do. So, what the heck!


You're a Communicating!
Chie, your Relationship IQ is 122

Your Relationship IQ score is a number that measures your general knowledge of how people should behave in relationships. But we also took a look at how you behave in your relationships. Your test results tell us that your greatest relationship strength is communicating with your partner while your weakest is accepting your partner's differences.

The Relationship IQ Test
Brought to you by Tickle

You're a Facts Curator!
Your IQ score is 126

This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the Classic IQ Test relative to others. Your Intellectual Type is Facts Curator. This means you are highly intelligent and have picked up an impressive and unique collection of facts and figures over the years. You've got a remarkable vocabulary and exceptional math skills — which puts you in the same class as brainiacs like Bill Gates. And that's just some of what we know about you from your test results.

The Classic IQ Test
Brought to you by Tickle

Pretty in Pink

Chie, your signature color is Pink Chiffon!

There's nothing saccharine about you — your sweetness is one hundred percent natural! A gentle, thoughtful romantic like you must be paired with a color that's soft and warm — but still has a subtle sophisticated sheen. That's why Pink Chiffon is the perfect color for you! You're probably known for making the most of every situation and trying to see the best in people. But while you may be cheerful and innocent at times, you're nobody's fool. You may see the world through rose-colored glasses, but you can still see, after all.While you make wise insights time after time, it's probably your good nature and perpetual optimism that are what you're known for and what make you a joy to be around. Even those who sometimes make fun of your Pollyanna-like proclamations will turn to you when they need a friend and some cheering up. So keep pink, Chiffon. With you around, the world's a better place!


What's Your Signature Color?
Brought to you by Tickle

Broken stained-glass windows, the fragments ramble on
Tales of broken souls, an eternity's been won
As critics scorn the thoughts and works of mortal man
My eyes are drawn to you in awe once again

In your picture book I'm trying hard to see
Turning endless pages of this tragedy
Sculpting every move you compose a symphony
And you plead to everyone, "see the art in me"

The ART of Letting Go

To let go doesn't mean to stop caring;
it means I can't do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off;
it's the realization that i don't control another.
To let go is not to enable,
but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness,
which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to care for,
but to care about.
To let go is not to fix,
but to be supportive.
To let go is not to be protective;
it is to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny,
but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue,
but to to try to become what i dream i can be.
To let go is not to regret the past,
but to grow and live for the future.

To let go is to fear less and to love more.

NOTHING WITHOUT YOU...

it's the quiet night that breaks me,I cannot stand the sight of this familiar place
it's the quiet night that breaks me, like a dozen papercuts that only I can trace
all my books are lying useless now
all my maps will only show me how to lose my way.

oh call my name. you know my name
and in that sound, everything will change
tell me it won't always be this hard
I am nothing without you, but I don't know who you are.

it's the crowded room that breaks me, everybody looks so luminous, and strangely young
it's the crowded room that's never heard, no one here can say a word of my native tongue
I can't be among them anymore
I fold myself away before it burns me numb.

oh call my name. you know my name
and in that sound, everything will change
tell me it won't always be this hard
I am nothing without you, but I don't know who you are.


I am nothing without you, but I don't know who you are....

Untitled

There are just nights when you feel that no matter how many stars there are in the galaxy,
there is never enough light to fill the sadness of the sky.
You hope and wait for that brightest star to finally come to light up your world.
But in the end, there's only coldness encompassing emptiness in its arms.
Dig within yourself and you'd find all the strength that you would ever need.
Strength to move... Move away from what you have always known.
And you'll discover that brightness is only just a relative word.

******

=====>>>>A simple reminder to the one who have written these inspiring words for me to hold onto while drifting along these wide open spaces. To a fellow hopeless romantic who believes in happy-ever-afters. When you've returned from your quest, don't forget to hollerback...<<<<<=====

FOUND THIS IN ONE OF MY HS FRIEND'S BLOG...TALK ABOUT JOLOGS!!!! BUT HEY, WE ALL HAVE OUR MOMENTS NAMAN DIBA? PAGBIGYAN NA... READ THROUGH FROM TOP TO BOTTOM MUNA THEN SAKA KAYO MAG-JUDGE. I DARE ANYONE WHO DISAGREES. HEHE. ENJOY =)

"This is dedicated to the one person I know who ultimately believes in love...whose faith never wavered. For all the love you've given. For all the heartaches and pain. For everything... don't ever change. Believe. You're far
stronger than you think. You've been such an inspiration. Thank you for the sense of belongingness."

***

MAHAL MO NGA BA SIYA?

para sa mga taong nanliligaw, nagbabalak manligaw, nililigawan, naliligaw, nag-iintay maligawan at nagbabalak lumagay sa magulo..........
ang love ay hindi minamadali...
hindi pinipilit..at lalong hindi kina-career...aray ko
unang-una...
PAANO MO BA NASABING MAHAL MO NA SIYA???...
dahil ba natutuwa ka sa kanya???...
o kaya naman naaaliw ka???...
naswee-sweetan ka ba ng sobra sa kanya???...
kinikilig ka ba pag nakikita mo siya???...
at nahi-high kapag naririnig mo na ang boses niya???...
eh teka muna...baka naman infatuated ka lang....
o kaya naman kagaya nga ng sagot mo...
BAKA naaaliw ka lang...
dahil kakaiba siya...
may spark na hindi mo maintindihan...
tsk!!!...
ang saklap nyan!...
pangalawa...
GAANO MO NA BA SIYA KAKILALA???...
madali ba siyang mapikon???...
pano ba siya mabadtrip???...
madali bang mahalata na may topak siya???...
ano bang suot niya pag nasa bahay siya???...
shorts ba o pantalon???...
nakasando ba siya o naka-t-shirt lang???...
matagal ba siyang maligo???....
kumakain ba siya ng vegetables???...
tamad ba siya???...
mas gusto ba niyang manood ng tv kaysa magbasa ng libro???...
nagpe-playstation ba siya???...
tatlo ba ang pamangkin niyang lalaki???...
makukulit ba yung mga kamag-anak niya???...
green ba ang kulay ng gate ng bahay nila???...
sa village ba siya nakatira???...
may sakayan ba ng jeep na malapit sa kanila???...
nagsisimba ba siya linggo-linggo???...
kasama ba yung pamilya niya???...
at nagdadasal ba siya bago matulog???...
in short...
alam mo na nga ba???...
ang mga bagay-bagay...
ang mga simpleng bagay tungkol sa kanya...
na nagdedetermine ng sarili niya...
s in kung sino ba talaga SIYA...
pangatlo...
KAYA MO BA SIYANG TANGGAPIN???...
as in TANGGAPIN ng buong-buo...
sa lahat ng trip niya sa buhay...
sa lahat ng katopakan niya...
sa lahat ng pag-iinarte at pag-dadrama niya...
sa lahat ng kasalanang nagawa, ginawa, at gagawin pa lang niya...
sa lahat ng naiisip niya...
sa lahat ng sasabihin niya...
sa kilos niya...
sa pananamit pa pala niya...
sa pagsasalita...
sa pananaw niya sa buhay...
sa pagtrato niya sa tao...
sa lifestyle niya...
sa uri ng pamilyang meron siya...
sa uri ng kaibigang kasa-kasama niya...
sa style niya pagdating sa love...
sa kasweetan niyang natural...
sa paglalambing niya...
sa tawa niyang pagkalakas-lakas...
sa manners niya...
sa bisyo niya kung meron man...
sa mga pang-aasar niya sayo...
sa style niya pagdating sa pagsolve ng problema...
sa problemang maaari ka ring masama...
pang-apat...
KAYA MO BANG MAGING TOTOO???...
kaya mo bang makita yung sarili mo...
na kasama pa rin siya ha...sa isang sitwasyong pag naisip mo eh...
mapapaiyak ka na lang sa sakit...
nang dahil din sa kanya???...
kaya mo bang magmukhang t****...
as in umiyak ng dahil sa kababawan...
ibuhos ang mga nararamdaman mo...
kahit na puro kababawan nga lang naman...
as in kahit sa harapan niya???...
kaya mo bang maging barubal pag kasama mo siya???...
yung tipo bang wala ka ng pakielam...
mawala man ang manners mo...
na wala ka naman talaga...
in short...
KAYA MO BANG MAGING IKAW KAPAG KASAMA MO NA SIYA???...
yung tipong hindi ka nahihiyang ipakita kung sino ka talaga...
dahil alam mong...
HINDI MO LANG SIYA TANGGAP...TANGGAP KA RIN NIYA...BUONG-BUO RIN...
PEOPLE!!!...
tama na kasi ang trip...
tama na ang pagmamadali...
oo masarap ngang mainvolve sa isang tao...
pero diba mas masarap yun...
LALO NA KUNG ALAM MONG TOTOO YUNGNARARAMDAMAN MO. ...
kaya dapat, hinde tayo nagpapabulag sa akala nating LOVE....
mag antay na lang tayo....
wag natin unahan....
for all we know, nde pa pala cya ang para sa atin......
pero pag nasagot mo lahat ng nasa taas....
baka nga mahal mo na cya....

it's true. no matter where we are in the world, no matter the distance, the time difference and well,how many oceans or even continents that separate us from the people we love...if they want to reach us...if they want to talk to us, see us, get ahold of us...they will. if we want to find them, be with them..see them...talk to them...we will.

if we want something sooo bad, who can stop us from getting them?

it scares me to think how powerful we can really be...if we set our hearts and minds onto something...the possibilities are just...limitless.

***

limits.

how far are we willing to go? how long till we figure out that it's not even worth the fight...and that we've actually reached our limits..and pushing it even further would mean tittering towards the boundaries of stupidity.

do we need to wait for the time when we wake up one morning and feel totally disappointed...even to the point of being disgusted...to be slapped in the face of what abomination we've been subjecting ourselves to?

***

scary world out there.

***

i need to get myself back.

***

its not to the left. this time, let's do it right ;-)


Note: (thanks to a long-lost-once-again-found-honest-to-goodness-vivacious-girlfriend...stay fab, ste!)

Road to Insignificance

(The Dreaded Countdown)

JUNE
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28th
(D-Day: Dooms day or Deliverance Day?)

Silence
…
Stillness
…
Oblivion
…
Insignificance

…the end?

29
Survived…
A new quest has begun.

==> Confessions <==

The gentle breeze surrounding me,
The sound tranquility of the rolling ocean waves,
The serene beauty of the crimson sunset,
The rejuvenating feel of the sand on my feet as I walk along the endless shore,
Nothing… compared to you.

The sweet enticing scent of a freshly-picked rose,
The unrivaled crispness of snow as it falls, descends and kisses my little nose
The tiny soothing raindrops trickling down my face,
The love offered by everyone around me,
Nothing… compared to you.

Nothing in this world
Can compare to the way I feel for you..
The way I fly when I'm with you
The sheer longing when I'm without you.

Nothing can compare to your warm presence, your soft doting kisses and your comforting embrace
I would give everything... to feel your love once again.

Because...Nothing… absolutely nothing…
And...No one… undoubtedly no one can compare to you.
No one… absolutely no one...
Can EVER BE you.

-30-

The Story Behind the Lone White Rose

June 20th....

1 long-stemmed white rose...

flower of pure intention...

well-intended thoughts resulting in a sordid confrontation.

confrontation between friends...

friends turned into lovers...

lovers against all odds...

all odds conquered (withstanding the test of time).

bereft with love undone...

friends no longer...

strangers once again...

20 June...four years after.

-30-

Tonight I Can Write

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, 'The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing.
In the distance.My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

By: Pablo Neruda

Random thoughts on Love... Love-lost... Wanderings... Letting Go...Moving on & the Pursuit to Happiness!

***

"Leaving a love you've suddenly outgrown can be heartbreaking, but it also shows you're strong enough to walk away from a relationship that no longer makes you happy. Moving out of your comfort zone can be downright scary, but it also proves just how brave you are to take on the unknown. Stronger, braver, wiser. You always do a little growing up everytime you do a little letting go."

-Oprah

****

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred.


2. Free your mind from worries.


3. Live simply.


4. Give more.


5. Expect less.

*****

"Do you think love is a choice or by chance?"

"It’s by chance. If you fall in love, you don’t exactly have a choice do you?"

"For me it’s a bit of both. A chance meeting with someone is still a choice. For example you met that person in the street; both of you chose to take the same route and when you bumped into each other, it became a chance encounter. You don't fall in love by chance. It's still up to you if you really want to love this person, murder charges and all or not. Our minds like to play tricks on us that's why we think we couldn't help falling in love. Contrary to what books and movies had us believe, love is a decision and not just a mere feeling."


"I’m not going to argue with you on that. At some level, I agree with you. But what brought on this sudden insight?"


"It’s not sudden. I said that almost a year ago when a friend asked me the same question. I realized I wasn’t completely right. You can’t decide not to fall in love."


"Is it so bad to let go and give in?"


"To fall in love is to create a religion with a fallible god. I don’t remember who spoke these words. It doesn’t really matter. What matters is that it is true. I did fall in love. But you are not fallible yet."

******

Happiness comes in many forms. In the company of good friends. In the company of someone special that came into your life when you least expect it. In the feeling that you get when you make someone elses dream come true. Or in the promise of hope and love renewed. It's okay to let yourself be happy. Because you never know how fleeting that happiness might be.

MEN ARE FROM MARS, LIBRANS ARE FROM VENUS (",)

General characteristics of the sign Libra:
Libra are focussed on the other, the surroundings, and the company. (didn’t quite get this) They are social, honest, like to have contact with people. They are not very good at living alone. Are inclined to do what others want, to spoil the others and to get along with them (in short… uto-uto. =) so far, so true). They have little willpower and perseverance (uyy! Di naman!). They can put themselves in somebody else's shoes, can’t stand discord, want to keep the peace al the time (peace men). They want order and rule in their life and try to avoid unpleasant situations at any price and like to be honest. They become nervous by controversy and violence, can’t live in disharmony and uncivilised surroundings i They have an aversion for ugly objects, rough language, bad manners and inappropriate colours (bawal ang chaka! Arte talaga!hehe). They love having others do things for them, like to be spoiled and always have someone around who will do the dirty and nasty jobs for them(if you can get away with it, why not?!?). It is their charming nature that gets away with it(Whaaaaat?!?!?). They stand up for those who have been treated wrongly (This I can vouch for. Saktan nyo na ako wag lang ang mga taong mahal ko. Or kahit sa common tao, when I see that the game is played unfairly... warfreak mode na ito!). They are very good defenders, adjudicators, and mediators. They can bring parties together again. They are balance-seekers, make compromises gladly and speak through their hearts, not only emotionally but also intellectually (finally! A note on ones intellectual capacity. Something worth mentioning). They don’t condemn, they are peacemakers. They are always pleasant and polite, of good will and give in easily, but they are not always real. They can say one thing, but mean something else (doble-kara? Di naman. Siguro at times, when we don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings, we tend to “sugarcoat” the things that we say.Sortakinda wthitelie lang kumbaga). They talk around a subject but they never say what they really want(hehe. Minsan kasi dyahe aminin yung totoong nararamdaman. Especially when you know that the other person doesn’t reciprocate your feelings. Mag-beat around the bush nalang). They love material goods, are good in arranging a house and have good taste (nice…). It comes out in the feeling for colours and proportions. They love beautiful things, have an eye for quality; only want to buy the most expensive and best things (some things you go for quality and aesthetic value, but some things you just have to go with practicality). They also love physical beauty; a partner must be especially good looking and be a "somebody"(hehe… I plead guilty as charged. Partner has to be at least cute. Hehe.). Many Libras are mannequins. They love a quiet and pleasant life, can be artistic, often play piano or violin and love flower arrangements (Martha Stewart is that you?!)). They like to talk and negotiate, consider things, reconsider, exchange views/ideas. A Libra has difficulties in making decisions, must always weigh one's words, must always compare (tumpak!). They are always in company, can walk along with anybody, especially with those who are wealthy or who are "important"(Important: “Company” must be able to indulge in a voracious tirade of ideas. Social status is definitely NOT an issue. Basta non-sensical and provocative yung discussion… go ako! I hate boring people. But even worse are those that talk in circles. Yung walang pinatutunguhan usapan kasi paulit-ulit lang). But they also need time for themselves. Music is very important for Libra, they love it and it gives them energy and inner balance (just recently discovered the beauty of music and the serenity it offers. Book person kasi ako e). They also love beautiful soft colours (just as long as it’s purple, lilac, violet, periwinkle. hehe). They lack self-confidence, always need a pat on the back, always need to be encouraged and when that does not happen, they become uncertain and depressed (Define insecure!). They are never aggressive but can be quite negative (At pessimistic pa!). They need confirmation constantly. That uncertainty comes to the foreground especially if they have to make a decision. They can’t make decisions and can’t choose (Oo noh! Lalo na if ang choices ranges from the super cool strappy sandals that I so wanted and the platform shoes that matches my new top. Major shopping dilemma. Solution: Buy both! Always works! Never fails). They attach too much importance to material things, and therefore neglect the intellectual life (Gusto mo away! Ano daw?! Over my dead gorgeous body! Will never be an airhead!). It’s easy to flatter them (true. Mababw lang kaligayahan ko e); they can’t stand criticism, especially not from their friends (ouch!). Of all the signs Libra are the ones who can enjoy life the most. They are very pleasant people to get along with. They can sacrifice themselves to keep the peace and approach people with kindness (As I’ve said, great love are measured in great sacrifices). They don’t lack friends, are generally popular. They always looks well, are generally good looking, might have a dimple in the chin or in the cheeks (haba ng hair!). They are charming and quickly become the centre of attention in a group. They love flirting and showing themselves off (uhmm..dati siguro). They are very good in taking the initiative in a relationship (yep!). They love getting attention and are the life of a party. One of their big fears is not being accepted by others, it’s terrible for them when they are ignored (Super KSP talaga! Pero di nga, sometimes kaya I hesitate to make the first move to greet someone dahil sa fear of rejection). If they can hang around whilst visiting someone, then they are in their element. Libra uses their charms to reach their aim (Have yet to fully discover this awesome power!). They can make you fall in love with them to get what they want (Nyak!). They can also let others do things that they dare not do themselves (Charm and hypnotism?!? Hmmm….). Then they can make a helpless impression but in the meantime everything gets done (damsel-in-distress?). They never quarrel but will let a person know, in a sensitive way, that they are not happy.

In a profession, Libra need work in which they can be creative. A profession that has to do with acting (?!?-never in my wildest dreams!), which would suit them, or working with soft beautiful material(mananahi?). They can also have talent in the musical area (this definitely evaded me! can’t carry a tune.hehe). They are very suitable for work in which they can express their charms(that word again!). Such as hostess or host, T.V.- announcer, guide or receptionist in i.e. a hotel. Also for professions which have to do with appearances (whaaaaaaattt?!?), i.e. beauty care, plastic surgery, make-up artist, or the making of beautiful hairpieces, and of course also in professions in which they can mediate. They are very hospitable, and tend to spoil their guests. What they like the most is having dinner outside, be well dressed, show them off, to be served, preferably with a good-looking partner, and rather in a restaurant where you can meet important or well-known people (socialera!). They also love to go to openings. They feel themselves at ease everywhere (artistahin pa!). They love to flirt and being in love (Need I say more?). That is very important for Libra (Bow.).

The health of Libra
Libra's weakest spots are the eyes, the kidneys, and they can suffer from gout, cold on the bladder (?!?), kidney inflammation, migraine, and problems with blood circulation. Libra is sensitive for draught(huh?). Because of this they can easily get a throat or ear inflammation. If they get too tired Libra can get into trouble with intestinal/abdominal disorders (pakikonek nga po…pagod tsaka sakit sa tyan.). They can suffer from depression and can’t see the light of day from time to time (haha. guilty as charged). If they get love and attention, this can pass quickly (in short, KSP). Libra can suffer if there is no LOVE in their life (para namang sobrang desperado na ang dramang ito). Libra doesn’t give too much attention to food (ang sekreto sa pagpapapayat!); relationships and parties are more important (di naman masyado…slight lang). They must watch out for cosmetic remedies, this can cause skin problems. Lots of sleep and rest is a must. Libra needs the sun and especially contact with others. The sport which suits Libra the best is: dancing (no objections on this one) and figure skating (I used to dream of being a figure skater…feeling ko ako yung bida sa Ice Castles; but never did have the time to even don a pair of skates), at least if they can show discipline.

External characteristic:
Often a beautiful body, tall and slim. Generally dark hair and dark eyes, straight nose, an honest and open glance. Harmonious facial features. Dimple in the chin or cheeks. – Shocks! na-shy naman ako. Pero, straight nose? Nah! At least, 9/10 ako. =) …’chos!

Professions:
Violist (?!?), hairdresser, jeweller, diplomat, actor (?@#!?), receptionist, auctioneer, appraiser, hostess, make-up artist, TV announcer, photographic model(ano daw?!?), plastic surgeon, artist, guide, lawyer, judge. Employment agency, marriage bureau, beauty specialist, ballet dancer. Salesman of luxuriously articles or home furnishing. Professions where beauty (ows?!?)and contractual qualities play a role.

Love life:
It is not easy for Libra to live alone, they need somebody else to feel happy, need a lot of attention and compliments, want to be desired most of the time and to be attached and adored (painstakingly true!matulog nga lang mag-isa di ko carry…dati. huhuhu)Libra will find another lover if there is a quarrel and disharmony or when the attention to the relationship diminishes (I beg to differ ha.). Libra has the inclination to spoil the loved one (super spoiled...as in! Talk about generosity). They love to have a partner who is wealthy, because they need much for themselves, loves luxury, beautiful things, nice and expensive food and especially beautiful clothes(ano ito!gold-digger ang drama? “Loves beautiful clothes”-dito lang tumama eh! ). Libra are condescending, even-tempered, elusive, need harmonious relationships, are attentive in love(oh so true), but not always faithful(oist! Soooo not true! Forever faithful ako!).

Suitable life partner: Gemini and Aquarius.


colour: bright green(eeek!), pink, purple (at talagang isiningit ito)
stone: jade, emerald, turquoise, adventuring (?!@#???!)
fauna: deer, nightingale, dove, lizard, snake
flora: wild berry, violet, lily of the valley, white lilac, lilies(ang galing! Lilies are my absolute fave flowers!)
country: Austria, Egypt
metal: copper
lucky#: 6 and 9
day: Friday
sport: surfing
tarot card: justice
planet: Venus(at magmaganda daw talaga.hehe)

"As we grow older, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast...you'll realize you can no longer hold onto the past yet you can't feel ever living in the present and you see the future slowly slipping away. Inevitably, you'll eventually lose someone you love.

So take too many pictures, laugh too much til your tummy hurts, sing to your heart's content, dance like nobody's watching, live each moment like there's no tomorrow and LOVE like you've never been hurt before. Because every sixty seconds you spend upset and aggravated, is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

But for those of us who are only momentarily "drifting", find solace in the arms of faith, take comfort in the wings of hope and feel empowered in the prospect of a greater love."

Untitled

Not just my princess, you're my angel
And i could stare through your eyes forever
So i wish to wake up beside you in every sunrise
And if it won't be now help me find a way somehow

I'll wait for you, i'll die without you
I'll be by your side through space and tides much longer than time

You're the riddle's answer
The last piece of the puzzle
So i wish to walk with you along the sunset-lit shore
And if it won't be now help me find a way somehow

I'll wait for you, i'll die without you
I'll be by your side through space and tides much longer than time
Please hold on, don't leave me, don't give up on me, let me be everything that you ask of me,
It will never be perfect, it may not be smooth, but i promise you i'll make things right for us soon

They wove the threads

Made them into ropes
And from opposite poles
We got to tie them both
Then they lit a match
Burned what was tied
We blew the flame
But it didn't die

So i'll, i'll wait for you,i'll die without you

I'll be by your side through space and tides much longer than time
You're the one...



I adore you...



You are my bliss.









By: Greyhoundz

RAMBLINGS OF A BROKEN HEART

"Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings."
~anais nin~

IF ONLY….
==>you<==

If only I paid more attention when she was telling me how much she loved me.
If only I told her how much I really appreciated all her efforts in orchestrating every monthsary, anniversary, birthday or even the “just-because” surprises she lovingly spoiled me.
If only I valued all the times we spent together and not waste any second of it fighting over the silliest things.
If only I didn’t complain so much about her annoying fetishes and just let her be.
If only I showered her with more attention during those times that she badly needed me.
If only I enjoyed to the fullest every date she took me out to, every movie we watched, and every resto we dined in.
If only I relished every sweet kiss, every loving touch, every comforting embrace.
If only I melted in every meaningful stare.
If only I savored every softly-whispered “I love you” and the million times she said “I miss you”.
If only I lingered in the pure bliss of her ecstasy.
If only…
...YOU were still mine.

IF I COULD ONLY…
==>me<==

If I could only hear another sweet I love you.
Celebrate another monthsary… one more anniversary…with you...
And begin to count our years together...once again.

If I could only feel your mesmerizing gaze that melts my heart and weakens my will...
Or sense your lingering touches…
Taste your soft, passionate kisses…
And be in your loving presence...once again.

If I could only hear you sing another song that caresses my heart and touches my soul...
As your fingers strum each chord with dedicated purpose…
Your voice resonating in my head and through my very core…

If I could only stop the world from spinning… revisit the past and rewrite each bittersweet memory of our love into an unending fairy tale.
If only I could turn back time and re-live all those happy moments we shared together.
If only I could....
…STAY.

-30-

BROKEN PURPLE

Feelings fade, people change.
Nothing remains unchanged - even the strongest of feelings.
Love is naught unless you fight ‘til the bitter end.
Faced with the crossroad that is your own -
Go down the wire and through the fire… burdened by the cross of betrayal
Or breakfree from the chains of misery and set your love free…
Unbound your heart, release your soul, watch him fly…
Hold no longer. Let go.

Pain begets hope.
Hope to find light at the end of your darkest day.
Life is a journey.
Live life lest you wither into nothingness…
Stay.

The choice is no one but ours to make…No one but ours to face.
Be strong.
Take heed.
Make a stand.
Have faith.
Believe.
And LOVE…once again.

-30-

INSATIABLE

I remember my Prof in Psych saying that a man's wants and desires are endless. Our list of what "I want to buy", "what I want to have", "what I want to achieve", "what I want to become" or just simply "what i want" can go on forever.

When I was in elementary I couldn't wait to get to high school and be able to enjoy the so-called "highschool life". In highschool, I counted the days when I can pack my bags and live the life of independence that college has to offer. In college, I wanted to be everything... CEAT's college scholar (I only made it to honor roll), everybody's friend (BS Org nga ako e), a power-dancer (at least I tried to be & made it to the CORE group that became SOP champs), the best organizer and orchestrator of all the activities of the UPLB SJazz clan (the mind behind it all), and last but certainly not the least I did my best to be the perfect gf.

I did everything in my power to get everything that I wanted. After college, I thought I had it all...a perfect job, a perfectly planned future, a perfect partner who means the world to me and loves me unconditionally, a perfect life. Or so I thought.

Why's it that when we earn just enough to survive, we aim for a more lucrative job. After landing that dream job, we seek for other employment opportunities that offer better benefits. After getting all the benefits anyone can ask for, we still try to scout for a more challenging post. What is there left to take?

When we have fairly enough money to buy anything we want, we want more money to buy all the other things that we think we want. And even after getting all those things, we still find ourselves looking for extra jobs, accepting loads & loads of overtime, channeling our business skills to look for other sources of income. And for what? To get the newest Nokia cellphone (whose value depreciates faster than you can blink), to buy a new pair of Manolo Blahnik's or Jimmy Choo's that you've been eyeing for months, or so you can afford another getaway trip to Bora? Then, what's next in your unending wish list?

When we were single we secretly prayed for our prince charming to come and carry us off to our happy-ever-after. We prepare ourselves for that one person, so that when our one great love comes, we can offer ourselves whole..not wanting anything else...not desiring anything more... not looking for what is not there. We enjoy the bliss of love, togetherness & loyalty. We do all things as one. We are bounded by this inexplicable feeling that drives us to be the best possible person we can be for our partner. We plan to spend our lives together... forevermore. But for some reason, when we are already in a secured, stable and loving relationship, we tend to think of all the "what ifs" and "what could have been". We long for the "magic" that has been lost in the essence of fondness and familiarity. We envision that love should last for a lifetime. And when we don't "feel" the love that we used to know, is it reason enough to say that you have fallen out of love? That somehow, love has been lost in the many years that you have been together. It was inevitably consumed... prodding you on to begin another search of that lost feeling... to find love once again.

Do we then just turn our backs to our one great love? How sure are we that what's out there is what(who) we want? What if the very person you're trying so hard to look for, is already the very same person standing right in front of you? Is it worth giving up your forever for?

And if you decide to take the jump...take the risk...How do you then say goodbye to the person you promised forever to?

HAPPINESS 101

HAPPINESS. Lately, I have been puzzled by this word - as to what exactly is its meaning. How can you define the feeling of being happy? Is it something that you experience on your own or do you need an external force to be familiar with it? Is it a lasting feeling or just a fleeting emotion? Is it exactly the way we understand it…a feeling, an abstract emotion, a vague quantification of a state of mind? So I did a little research. Here’s what I found from a very reliable source…the mother of all linguists and etymologists, Merriam-Webster. HAPPINESS is:

Pronunciation: 'ha-pE-n&s
Function: noun
Definition: 1 a feeling or state of well-being and contentment
2 a: JOY b : a pleasurable or satisfying experience
3 the feeling experienced when one's wishes are met -- see PLEASURE

Synonyms blessedness, bliss, blissfulness, felicity, gladness, joy
Related Words elatedness, elation, exhilaration, exultation, intoxication; ecstasy, euphoria, heaven, rapture, rapturousness; delectation, delight, enjoyment, pleasure; cheer, cheerfulness, exuberance, gaiety (also gayety), gladsomeness, glee, gleefulness, jollity, joyfulness, joyousness, jubilation, lightheartedness; content, contentedness, gratification, satisfaction
Near Antonyms anguish, desolation, joylessness, sorrow, woe, woefulness; blues, dejection, depression, despondency, disheartenment, dispiritedness, doldrums, downheartedness, gloom, gloominess, melancholy, mournfulness
Antonyms misery, sadness, unhappiness, wretchedness

I have previously claimed that finding happiness is ones prerogative. It’s your choice. But, come to think of it, can you really will yourself to be happy? After losing a very important person in my life, I have come to value things that I have long taken for granted. I kept thinking about those “happy moments”… If only I relished every sweet kiss, every loving touch, every comforting embrace. If only I melted in every meaningful stare. If only I savored every sweet“I love you” and every lovingly uttered “I miss you”. If only I wallowed in the pure bliss of his ecstasy. If only I could turn back time and re-live all those happy moments we had together. If only…

Is happiness relative?
Is it relative to a person who makes you smile, tickles your funny bones, touches your heart and gives you that tingling feeling down your spine? Is it relative to a satisfying job or a fulfilling career that boosts your ego and makes you feel all-powerful? Is it relative to a devoted husband, a loving wife or the perfect children? Is it relative to all the grandiose material possessions that you’re able to obtain throughout your lifetime?

Is happiness quantifiable?
Let’s see if we can come up with a scale to measure happiness. When can we say that we’re truly happy? Is it possible to develop a “happiness gauge” so you can keep tabs on how happy you really are during a particular moment?

How Long Will It Last?
Can we really believe in forevermore? Is there such a thing called “happy-ever-after”? Or are all forms of happiness tend to be momentary?

Factors that Contribute to Ones Happiness:

1. Active and committed presence of the “one great love”
2. Sense of belongingness to a family (not broken or dysfunctional in any way)
3. A supportive barkada who loves to reiterate to you, lest you forget, the definition of FUN (di pede ang KJ…feeling high school pa din)
4. A greatly-fulfilling career and a high-paying job that enables you to buy everything you need and more.
5. Money… money… and lotsa’ lotsa’ money… pero sabi nga nila diba, money can buy you all the things you want but not everything you need (i.e. love, time, etc). Hence, erase…erase…erase!
6. The prospect of a “new” love… the kilig factor… the eagerness to unveil the mystery behind the unfamiliarity… the tingling excitement of finding something new, uncovering the real person inside… the magical first kiss…
   
   

Ode to -beinte otso-

The past 1361 days… a little over 45 months… have undoubtedly become the very best days of my life. Everything has changed since that fateful day when fate brought us together… our goals, our priorities, our perceptions in life, our friends and families… everything has come and gone except YOU. You were the one “constant” that helped me get through the good, the bad, the happy and sad moments of my life. Whenever I’m down, you were always there to pick me up, prodding me onwards to try again. You never gave up on me no matter what. You were the reason why I became the stronger and much wiser person that I am now. You were also the only one who cares and loves me enough to go the extra mile just to see me smile. For the past 3 years, you were my only source of pleasure and sheer bliss. You made life so worth living and you were the main reason why I have the will to wake up each passing day. Ultimately, you have given me the one thing that I have been longing for since the first time I have learned to love… security. You taught me how to trust again…to have faith in other people but most especially to have faith in myself. Your seemingly endless love for me has sown my heart together from disparity and heartbreak and made me whole. Since then, I have loved you like I never thought I could ever love someone else. I devoted my life to you and I gave you all of me.

But now we are faced with, by far, the hardest and most emotionally-consuming obstacle in our lives together. It shattered my heart and drained my very core. We never talked about breaking-up because you never wanted to hear even a word of it. Maybe because it was never an option – up until now. But the one thing that stuck to me that I remembered you saying was that if you were ever to face an inconceivable break-up… you will never give up easily on us and that you will fight for me to the end.

This is what I’m trying to do now. Please don’t hate me for doing this. I am not trying to make you miserable. It’s just that I feel it in my heart that I have to do this. I want to do this. Because I love you far more than you can ever imagine. I feel like this is the right thing to do… just like what happened last night… you holding me in your arms…it felt so right… that it’s where I belong. I’m not going to give up just like that. The war is not yet lost. Please let me know if I stand a chance… Please let me know if you want me to fight for you… for us. We are so good together. I know this will be hard but please stick with me.

I don’t want to look back to this day and regret why I did not even TRY to fight for you. Please give “US” a fighting chance. Don’t you think that we deserve one more shot? Honey, please… won’t you stay in the room with me? Let’s give “happy-ever-after” one more chance.

______________________________________________________________

LET'S STAY TOGETHER

I'm so in love with you
Whatever you wanna do
Is alright with me
You make me feel so brand new(It's you that always makes me feel brand new)
I want to spend my whole life with you(I just wanna spend my life with you)
Let me say that since, since we've been together
Loving you forever is what I need
Let me be the one you come running to(Let me be the one that you run to)
I'll never be untrue(I will never be untrue to you)
Oh baby let's stay together(Let's stay together)
Let's stay together(Let's stay together)
Loving you forever(Let's stay together)
Times are good or bad, happy or sad(Good, bad, happy or sad)
Ooh, tell me why can't we stay together(Good, bad, happy or sad)
Why, why do people break up
Turn around and make up

And I just can't see
You'd never do that to me(you would never do that to me)
Being around you is what I see(Being around you that is what I see)
Baby baby let's, let's stay together(Let's stay together)Loving you whether(Let's stay together)